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Hump Your Pillow Girlfriend, Loser!
Hi virgin loser! you’ve never had a girlfriend, have you? obviously not lol. i have the perfect solution - a pillow girlfriend! she won’t reject you like other women do. but you still have to treat her well! you’re going to follow all my instructions for wooing your new gf today. i’ll even give your pillow gf a name and allow you to hump her! i don’t think she’ll mind.
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